joy at its purest

I attended the Chosen Generation congregation between the ages of 15 to 18. During those 3 years God touched me in ways even Christians find hard to believe; I had a very close relationship with Him. Before I was a Christian, I used to have attacks in the night. They got much worse during the 3-yr period, to a point where these spiritual attacks got physical. But of course, I was not afriad, I had God on my side.

Chosen Generation moved their service back to St. Andrew's Cathedral after awhile and one day during service, I felt so distant. My Pastor was preaching about how one's close relations' salvation lie on one's shoulders. It was an unfamiliar location, I was getting over my worst attack ever, and I felt the whole burden of converting my relatives on my shoulders. I walked out and never went back to church.

Until today. My paternal cousin got married in a church. You see, my paternal relatives are all Buddhists, and worse still, they had a dislike for Christianity. The only Christian in my family's history before me was my father's youngest brother who fell to his death one Sunday morning on his way to church. So i was very happy that my cousin-in-law is a Christian and was looking forward to today when everyone of my paternal relatives was willing and going to church.

The feeling of being in the house of God again after 4 years is impossible to describe and it caught me totally unaware and by surprise. I had the hardest time holding back my tears and my heart was filled to the brim with joy (the emptiness was instantly gone). On top of that I found out that besides my cousin-in-law, my COUSIN himself is a Christian, baptised and had been going to church for awhile now. Its hard to imagine how the amount of joy being in the presence of God again could increase but it did when I saw my Grandmother, my Uncles and Aunties singing and clapping along during worship (Hokkien style!).

Today, also for the first time, I saw my nephew Jayden. Jayden has had heart surgery only to find out there is a bloodclot in his brain. He spent his first few months on this earth in the hospital. We almost lost him but today I saw him healthy and happy!



What I once thought was impossible is not impossible at all. For the first time in many years, might I say with all my heart, PRAISE THE LORD!