aki@nus: "not about being, but becoming".

[since i'm waiting for my files to move to my portable harddisk...]

i know someone running away from NUS to another foreign university has little ground to say this, but i really hope that everyone in NUS perks up a little and don't let the fact that our batch's guinea pig fate affect you guys. despite the faults, NUS has its strengths. besides, aren't we all eventually responsible for our own education?

complying 100% to rules and structures has never been my forte; if the environment is ever too oppressive, it's our responsibility to change things and not just wait things out. and it's even more in our role of the student to set our own trajectory.

there're times when i actually feel envious of our juniors. in fact, i've always wanted to say that despite all the things that was awful about the Year 2's Pavilion, i must admit that the whole project is quite an applaudable effort. i wish we had that kind of opportunity afforded to us; an official opening--complete with catering--and show to the world what we can do. it's really sad that the first autonomous house was put together, then later destroyed with little to no fanfare. that's why i always thought it was important to track the second autonomous house and create some semblance of excitement and discussion amongst ourselves--because i disapprove of the apparent lack of criticalness involved in a Pavilion that is meant to represent the faculty. at the end of the day still, if we don't inject pride into our own work, who will? you think your 'A' for design is the end in itself?

think again.

the school's new course structure is a real benefit for the kind of students that most of us have been brought up to be--spoon-fed. i think the school is really not kidding when it says that it's getting better, but only because the school is achieving what it has set out to. it's most unfortunate that i'm not aligned with its philosophy.

i despise the school not because they screwed us up, but insofar as they often readily reject us a failed crop of undergraduates who need endless chastise. yet i love our batch for who we are, a good varied mix of people whose lack of polish are great signs of a fumbling and struggle to understand architecture. it's a mark of exploration, without the pretentiousness often accorded to this endeavour. i like that we are not always afraid to fail--at least not before we submit, for this fearlessness is what great things are made. i like it even more that we don't worry ourselves silly over whether or not we can get an 'A' for design, because great things require a long process of unappreciated setbacks. if you want instant gratification, watch MTV, masturbate, whatever instead.

i'm not sure i get why jumeng likes to wonder and appreciates the idea before its materialisation, but i'd hazard that it's purely because the struggle is good, people.

"not about being, but becoming", remember?